VIDEO: No, Derrick Rose is Not Going to Have a 'Special Year' Because He Did Pilates With a Stick

No, you are not the first person to laugh at this headline. Derrick Rose does one weird exercise and some people think everything is going to change. Please, spare us.

The newest member of the Detroit Pistons had something of a return to form last year, boosting his points per game from 8 back up to 18. His Minnesota Timberwolves, still beleagured by the trade of Jimmy Butler, finished 36-46 and last in the NBA's Northwest Division, but his 50-point game back in October shined through as one of the most exciting moments of the regular season.

It's been an up-and-down few years for D-Rose since leaving his hometown Chicago Bulls, so the fact he's even back to being a solid secondary scorer is impressive and uplifting. Plus, he hasn't let his on-court struggles take away from his position as a role model.

Now, back to earth for a moment. How exactly will a stick help an athlete-- unless that athlete is a baseball player, and the stick is a Louisville Slugger? (Or Rawlings! Fine, okay, I don't want to get sued.). The only way that's going to work is if you keep rolling it under his leg, try to stretch it out like the Wonka taffy pull, and give him an extra reach on his fadeaway.