7 Colin Cowherd Takes We Truly Can't Believe Exist
By Michael Luciano

FS1 loudmouth Colin Cowherd might be most well-known of late for his increasingly vitriolic and petty feud with Cleveland Browns quarterback Baker Mayfield, but Cowherd has a vast array of baffling takes that span the entire American sports spectrum. From praising Andrew Bogut to ripping Mike Trout, here are seven Cowherd takes that will leave your jaw on the floor.
7. Philadelphia Is The Dumbest Sports City In America
.@ColinCowherd calls Philly "the dumbest sports city in America." ??? pic.twitter.com/HkvonfK7PD
— SPORTSRADIO 94WIP (@SportsRadioWIP) October 3, 2017
The worst part about this rant is that he doesn't even offer any justification. His only argument is that the fans "ran Andy Reid out of town" after 14 seasons and no championships. From there, he proceeds to just handpick whatever Philly stereotypes he likes, including illiteracy, jokes about Veterans Stadium, and incorrect history facts. Good thing he didn't throw in Rocky references or cheesesteak jokes, or this would have been a really hot take.
6. Trading Kristaps Porzingis Was the Best Day for the Knicks in Over a Decade
Best day for @nyknicks in over a decade and the fan base is complaining. Huh? You now have a future star (Knox), room for two FA stars, and a shot at potential mega star (Zion). And you’re unhappy? Did you really want to sign the brittle Porzingis to a max deal? Pass.
— Colin Cowherd (@ColinCowherd) January 31, 2019
Oh dear. Where to even begin with this? First off, Kevin Knox, he who shot 37 percent last year, is a future star? Second, they did get room for two free agents, but the two they had in mind, Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving, opted for the better-run team in Brooklyn. Third, they had the best chance of Zion, and then the ping-pong balls said no. I'd say most Knicks fans would gladly take Porzingis back instead of Julius Randle and eight other power forwards.
5. Dak Prescott is a Backup Tight End in the NFL
Dak Prescott is a back up in NFL. At tight end.
— Colin Cowherd (@ColinCowherd) November 15, 2014
This one aged well. While Prescott was a star at Mississippi State, concerns about his arm strength, reliance on running and ability to read defenses plagued him throughout the draft process. Dak ended up in the fourth round, and has proved himself to be at the very least an average NFL starter. The irony now is that Cowherd is firmly on the "Pay Dak, Not Zeke" train as both him and Ezekiel Elliott want new deals. Oh, how the tables have turned.
4. Colin Kaepernick Doesn't Love Football Because He's Political
"This dude doesn't sound tough enough or man enough for the game of football." — @WhitlockJason on Colin Kaepernick pic.twitter.com/20KtYmIg0x
— Speak For Yourself (@SFY) May 15, 2017
While this segment was being led by Jason Whitlock, who has enough conspiracy theories and eyebrow-raising takes to fill a list five times as long as this one, Cowherd wasn't always on Kaepernick's side when his protests were firmly under the microscope. While he did defend him a number of times, he occasionally gave into the "he doesn't love football" refrain when he was being blackballed. Kaepernick never said he was giving up football, so to assume that he was simply because of his politics is short-sighted to say the least.
3. Cavs > Warriors in 2017 Because of Andrew Bogut
Adding Andrew Bogut would make the Cavs a clear favorite over the Warriors
— Herd w/Colin Cowherd (@TheHerd) February 27, 2017
RT if you agree with @ColinCowherd pic.twitter.com/nmgGZMvNef
This doozy of a take broke the world record for being proved wrong. When the Cavs signed Andrew Bogut and Deron Williams, Cowherd asserted that this influx of size and veteran leadership gave Cleveland the edge over the Warriors. Bogut's Cavs career lasted all of 56 seconds. Not games. Seconds. He recorded two fouls and broke his leg. Williams, who was clearly washed, authored one of the worst individual performances we've ever seen in the Finals. This take is legendary in how wrong it was, as it didn't even last one night.
2. Jim Harbaugh is More Impressive Than Nick Saban
"I can make an argument that Jim Harbaugh's résumé is far more impressive than Nick Saban's." @ColinCowherd doesn't understand why people doubt Jim Harbaugh pic.twitter.com/jul7dHGpJN
— Herd w/Colin Cowherd (@TheHerd) August 28, 2018
Excuse me? You're talking about Harbuagh, who has won 66 percent of his games at the FBS level, against Nick Saban, who has six national championships under his belt and might be the greatest college football coach who ever lived. I understand that Harbaugh's 2-4 bowl record is very impressive to you, but it doesn't take a genius to see Saban has him beat across the board. Maybe Harbaugh should be able to beat Feleipe Franks before we start with the Saban comparisons.
1. Mike Trout is Irrelevant
?️@ColinCowherd: "Nothing against Mike Trout, but if he was at a mall in Los Angeles no one would know...
— FOX Sports Radio (@FoxSportsRadio) March 19, 2019
––Congrats on being ???? and ??????????." https://t.co/g7M2aR6JlW
While Cowherd never talks about baseball unless it involves Trout, Bryce Harper, or Aaron Judge (which is a bit embarrassing considering the amount of time and money FS1 has invested into baseball), this take is an all-timer. It's glorious in how wrong it is. Yes, the Angels front office is a clown show and they haven't won with the best player in the game, but to suggest that either Trout or the Angels are fools for agreeing on this contract makes no sense whatsoever. I would like an explanation on how the game's biggest star playing in Los Angeles will make him irrelevant.