​Dan Dakich is a college basketball analyst who enjoys personifying the "old man yells at cloud" Simpsons meme on a daily basis.


In his latest crusade against student athletes getting paid, Dakich cornered Kentucky player Derek Willis. We can only assume Willis stole his newspaper, or hit a baseball through his window. Nope -- this one's even better.


Dakich called out Willis for his tattoo, stating that there's NO WAY the Kentucky forward would be able to afford it if student athletes were truly poor.

Dakich, in between meals at Sherwood Farms Retirement Home, took a moment to give us his in-depth knowledge of what millennials are doing these days.


Of course, this doesn't begin to scratch the surface of why student athletes should (or shouldn't) be paid. It just makes a vague generalization about...well, we're still trying to figure that out.


Willis responded justly.

Dakich might need to pick up his false teeth after that knockout.

Realizing that it was likely past Dakich's bedtime, Willis decided to put this to bed quickly.

​​Goodnight, Dan. Don't forget you have shuffleboard tomorrow at 10 AM.